Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Anxiety and her issues of the day...

One would think that my Mom's main concerns during the day would be taking her pain meds on time as to avoid breakthrough pain, remember what to eat and what NOT to eat, napping, and hanging with her hubby.  Well, I am here to tell you she is NOT your typical pancreatic cancer patient.  Her anxiety for the day today...her new smart phone.  o.m.g.  How does this woman do it?  Of all the hell and turmoil and ruckus that is going on inside her body and inside her head, she is worried about how to use her new phone.  She is not a big fan of it.  Ha!  Who woulda thunk that my 60 year old mother would have a smart phone before me?!?  She talked on and on about what she didn't know how to do, how she could barely figure out how to receive a call.  She wants to take it back.  She wants her 'baby phone' back.  Honestly I about laughed my a$$ off when I heard her say that....'baby phone'.  She likes normal.  She is a fan of 'easy to use technology'.  And she is NOT into the smart phones.  The outcome of them having smart phones is still up in the air as they have 30 days to decide, but I am leaning towards her ditching it and going back to the old phone..

Why am I blogging about my mother and her smart phone?  Her issues with change?  With upgrading?  Pretty simple.  For the first time in awhile during our conversations, cancer didn't come up.  It did not plague our conversation.  It didn't loom over my head taunting me with its' hideousness.  It was stifled.  It was quiet. Even if it were for a very  brief 20 minute span.  We 'ignored' it.  It was one of the most glorious 20 minutes in recent history!  Listening to her rant and rave about a phone that is proving to be more intelligent than its' user was very entertaining.  It was an amazing conversation.  So lighthearted and carefree.  I want more of those conversations and I need to find a way to incorporate it into our lives.  I have come up with some ideas.  A LOT of ideas.  I want our time with her to be meaningful while she feels well.  I am considering having the kids write a 'book' for their Maga.  One that they complete all by themselves with little guidance from me.  I want the book to be filled with their memories with their Maga.  Let THEM tell the story how they see it through their little human eyes.  Make pages of questions that they want answers to, and we will 'interview' her for the answers.  I can envision how I want this all to go down.  After the book is completed, we will pick a date.  Make some junk food snacks, veg out on her living room floor with the entire family and have an interview night.  Record it.  Love it.  Learn from it.  Maybe we could do just a few pages per week, or maybe all of the book at once.  It's a starting point...  That's what we all need.  A jumping off point.  Something that we can all do together that does not require money or travelling or walking.  Being together making memories, reminiscing of the 'good ole days' and letting her be the center of our attention instead of cancer getting a front row seat.  I say that we give cancer a card to go to the back of the line for awhile.  It's far overdue.

No comments:

Post a Comment