Don't be scared of who you are....

Take the sparks from your heart
Let 'em burn like a star, in the sky
For everyone to see
Don't be scared of who you are
Let it out of the jar...

New song I found on youtube tonight.  I search youtube often, too often somedays.  Music inspires me.  Music moves me to tears and it makes my jaw drop open when I finally find the ONE song that I was looking for that says what I want to say, but can't.  Like tonight...this song...Couple More Sleeves by Andy Grammer.  WoW.  I read the lyrics twice and have already listened to the song like five times.  Love.  

So I am contemplating wearing MY heart on my sleeve.  Not for everyone to rip off of my arm, throw it on the ground and stomp on it as they are leaving me in their dust.  Not for someone to consistently use my heart to get what they want and what they need.  Not for any negative reasons whatsoever.  I want to wear my heart on my sleeve for two reasons...1.  I have never been an over emotionally affectionate person.  With my kids, that's a different story.  I could kiss and hug them all day long and show them just how much their momma really does love them, but I am quite confident my oldest would tire of the hugging and kissing immediately.  I want to be able to walk up to someone I have not seen in maybe a month or two, and just maybe give them a hug.  Say some overly kind words.  Make them feel better about themselves if they are stumbling through troubling times.  Help them up if they have fallen down or lay down with them if they are unable to get back up.  Being more sympathetic to the nature of other people's troubles and making a grand effort to leave my mark in the world and in the lives of the ones I love.  I want to be able to walk away from loved ones and know that there is NO doubt in their minds that I love them endlessly and would go to the ends of the earth for each and every one of them.  This is a goal that I CAN achieve, and I will

#2  Wearing my heart on my sleeve will teach me some good lessons in life.  You can only keep learning as you grow older.  Even if someone does happen to come by and stomp my heart into the ground, I will learn from it.  Taking away what kind of person I do NOT want to be, how I will never make someone feel, and how not to make friends.  Wearing my heart on my sleeve will allow me to lead a more passionate, meaningful life.  I plan on working on making people smile and feel loved.  I want my eyes to light up when they enter the room and I want them to NOTICE my eyes lighting up because they are in my presence.  Working on this whole 'wearing my heart on my sleeve' thing will take time.  It will require me to become a more open, forthcoming person.  If you know me, I am eager to keep my mouth closed during group conversations for fear of saying something stupid, or speaking the wrong opinions, or just staying mute because I am overly shy.  Work.in.progress.  I can do this.  I will do this.  It might take more time than I think I am willing to give, but I know I am worth it.  I know I can do this.  I know I have a lot to give, a lot to say, and a lot of people to love.  I will valiantly wear my heart on my sleeve when the time is right <3

This whole blog conversation stems from my firm belief in life that you should NEVER ever leave anything left unsaid.  If it's worth saying, well you better just go ahead and say it, because tomorrow is promised to NO ONE.  Ever.  End of story.  I will not live with regret for the things I should have or could have said.  They will be said with enthusiasm, concern, worry, fear, and with love.  Try it...Say what you need to say....ALWAYS.